Monday 19 October 2009

Sublime and ridiculous

There's a technique some gentlemen employ to prolong their pleasure in situations of intimacy. If they feel that the finish line is in sight a little too soon, they simply think of something unappealing in order to cool their ardor.

For an illustration of how effective this technique can be, take a look at two of the newest additions to the cast of 'Calendar Girls' in London's West End. Presumably, anyone who gets too excited at the prospect of sex symbol Kelly Brook in a state of undress, can always cop an eyeful of sex hieroglyphic Julie Goodyear instead.

Kelly has been posing in promotional shots for the musical, alongside Corrie's one-time barmaid-cum-battleaxe. Unsurprisingly, the press have been happy to use the pictures, despite the fact that Kelly has whipped her baps out more often than Greggs bakery. As for Julie Goodyear, appearing in the raw could be a real challenge, given that audiences are more used to seeing her dressed in enough fake animal print to reupholster Peter Stringfellow's entire living room.

Despite a career littered with failed attempts as a TV presenter and talent show judge, Kelly knows where her true strengths lie. And with a couple of strategically placed Belgian buns, she could well have the entire audience upstanding.

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