Thursday, 15 April 2010

Time for a little 'Bayhem'

For the last ten years, TV fans have been blaming the popularity of Big Brother for the never-ending succession of reality shows, coming at the expense of more established programme genres. Writers and actors are missing out, and increasingly the TV schedules are filled with hour-long shows depicting minor celebrities learning how to grout tiles or manually masturbate farm animals.

Hoping to bridge the gap is Michael Bay, who's taking time out from his busy schedule of 'blowing shit up' to develop an exciting new reality TV concept that will see contestants compete against each other in extreme conditions and hostile enviornments. This 'game with no rules' is described as a cross between Survivor, The Mole and The Amazing Race.

In this mash-up of previously flogged concepts, One Way Out will show "just how far people will go when they are stripped of their bare necessities and forced to do whatever it takes to survive."

Bay's spokesmonkeys have claimed that the show will "remain true to the filmmaker's signature style" meaning that it will be overlong, incoherent and featuring more sweaty, exposed flesh than the inside of one of ASDA's rotisserie ovens.

Interestingly, this new TV concept is being billed as 'Bay's first foray into unscripted TV', although based on his past form he's proved himself more than capable of working without any kind of a script. Don't forget, this is the man who gave the world clanging Transformer testicles.

As much as we might scoff at Bay's bold claims, there will be many people who'll be welcoming his promise of "unique twists, death-defying challenges and stunning visuals". Looks like the producers of Pineapple Dance Studios and Muslim Driving School may need to raise their game.

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