Tuesday, 4 August 2009

Sex sells

Leave it to the Australians to show our primped, preening, pumped-up sports stars how it's done. Over here, the end of one's illustrious sporting career can be spent contributing to the impending obesity timebomb, or mixing metaphors in the commentators' box. Not so in the land Down Under, when men are men, and sportmen are man-whores.

Warwick Capper (now there's a name that cries out for a lifetime in sports) is a former Australian rules football full-forward who played for the Australian Football League's Sydney Swans. During his heyday in the 1980s, he was as famous for his white boots and ridiculously tight shorts as he was for his prowess on the pitch. Since retiring from AFL in the late eighties, 'Wazza' has forged a curious and varied career. Amongst other things he's been an Amway spokesman, a stripper, a lollipop man and even campaigned in the Queensland elections.

However, following his recent $10,000 plastic surgery binge, Wazza is keen to capitalise on his hey day as a sex symbol. Only now, the symbol is a dollar sign.

In an unprecedented move he's announced that he is about to embark on a new career as a $1,500-per-night male escort. Speaking to Woman's Day in Australia, Wazza claimed "Usually it's groups who hire me. But if it's one woman for a dinner, why not? I'll make sure she has a good time. I think it's a good use of my talents." Ever the realist, he also pointed out that he'd have to charge extra for the sex. Well, no-one likes surprises.

This isn't Capper's first brush with the sex industry either. In 2007 he hit the headlines when a homemade sex-tape featuring him and his 25-year old girlfriend surfaced. The difference was, this amateur video was made intentionally for commercial release and was bought by a distributor for a six-figure sum.

Speaking to the press at the time, Capper confidently boasted that he was the Australian equivalent of Paris Hilton, before then claiming (unironically) "Someone also said I am like David Beckham. I'm a good-looking footballer with the same quick wit." Rumours that the LA Galaxy midfielder will be replacing Stephen Fry as the host of QI remain unconfirmed at the time of writing.

Despite all this, I have to applaud Capper for his honesty, commitment and lack of pretense. In the ego-driven world of professional sports, it makes a refreshing change. Now, who wants to go halves on Freddie Ljundberg?

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