Sunday, 17 May 2009

He said, she said, apparently...

The papers have been unsurprisingly falling over themselves to feed the Jordan/Katie publicity machine this week, with the news that Mr & Mrs Andre are to divorce. The great thing about a story like this, is that there are so many angles to cover.

Cynics can carp that it was fake all along, and Katie was simply biding her time to ditch Peter like the accessory he so clearly was. And the really cynically ones can contradict themselves by suggesting that the whole separation is another stage-managed publicity stunt, and that the couple will be happily reunited with a magazine story about them renewing their vows. In doing so, of course, they accidentally infer that the relationship was real to begin with.

Meanwhile, the rest of the bottom-feeders can flood the press with 'alleged' comments and insights (all in exchange for a handsome fee) into what's really going on between the estranged two-some. And that's precisely what they've been doing - how else would we know about the sexy texts, Peter's tears in Cyprus, the visits to divorce lawyers and, most recently, the two-year sex ban?

At the risk of sounding sympathetic to the couple, the alarming number of stories attributed to 'friends' and other unspecified 'sources' really shows up just how this culture of celebutainment infects the people on one's periphery to such a degree that everyone feels there's money to be made in it. Who cares if it's unquantifiable bullshit - as long as someone's paying, there'll be people who'll talk.

The wryly ironic postscript to all this is that the latest word from Camp Katie is that she's keeping a 'dignified silence'. This of course comes from her regularly updated Twitter feed, which allows her to give updates on the status of her marriage from the Maldives.

Interestingly, for a couple with no boundaries, limits or sense of self-restraint, none of us really have any clue as to what will happen next. Katie Price's talent is for being the most open 'closed book' on the celebrity circuit. And although we might not know what she's got up her sleeve, chances are, it'll turn into something lucrative.

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