Haven't we been here before? Last year, Carrie Prejean hit the headlines with a bumblingly inarticulate answer to a question about gay marriage in the Miss USA contest and inadvertantly turned herself into the poster child for homo-haters everywhere. Before the glitter had even settled on the pageant stage, she was being wheeled out to speak up for 'traditional marriage' on behalf of the Proposition 8 crowd.
Carrie ended up doing pretty well out of the whole controversy, releasing a best-selling book and film off the back of her time in the spotlight - although technically, the film was of Carrie on her back. But that's not important right now.
In the transient world of celebrity, there's always someone more interesting waiting in the wings. So say 'hello' to Lauren Ashley, the self-proclaimed Miss Beverly Hills, who plans to compete in the Miss California contest in November.
I say 'self-proclaimed' because, no-one from Beverly Hills has actually awarded her that title. She comes from Pasadena, but presumably thought that the 90210 postcode might lend her some extra flair and make her seem extra classy.
Then she opened her mouth.
Speaking to Fox News (who did so much to champion Carrie's freedom of self-expression) the winsome wannabe managed to trump her predecessor by going straight to the Bible for her answers: "In Leviticus it says, 'If man lies with mankind as he would lie with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination. They shall surely be put to death and their blood shall be upon them.' The Bible is pretty black and white... If he says that having sex with someone of your same gender is going to bring death upon you, that's a pretty stern warning, and he knows more than we do about life."
Thankfully, Beverly Hills Mayor Nancy Krasne was quick to decry Lauren's 'holier than thou' outburst, stating “The City Council was shocked to see statements made by a beauty pageant contestant under the name of Beverly Hills who does not live in nor represent our city. We are dismayed by any potential association with the City of Beverly Hills, which has a long history of tolerance and respect.” Lauren may be entitled to describe herself as 'Miss Beverly Hills', but she's got a tough few months ahead of her if her chosen district is so keen to disown her.
If nothing else, at least she's consistent. As well as being ugly on the inside, she's not exactly an oil painting on the outside either - unless it's by Edvard Munch. Rather than a beauty contest, I'd expect to see her auditioning for 'From Pramface to Princess'.
Still, I'm looking forward to seeing what passes for 'evening wear' when the contest finally rolls around - judging by the red dress she's wearing in all her pictures, I think she'll be hard pressed to find anything appropriate on the discount racks at Target.
It's unfortunate really. God may well know more about life than we do, but if she wants even a snowball in hell's chance of winning that contest, she really ought to concern herself with people who know more about makeovers. Plagues, famine and pestilence can only get a girl so far. She needs the guys who know their tweezers, straighteners and body-shapers. Perhaps she should have waited until they'd helped her on the road to victory, before condemning them.
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